Freeing Our Families From Perfectionism

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Perfectionism is not about doing our best. It’s not about the struggle for excellence, or the healthy striving for high goals.

Perfectionism is about believing that if we can just do something perfectly, other people will love and accept us—and if we can’t, we’ll never be good enough.

Perfectionism is a burden that takes a heavy toll. Personal relationships are strained. Intimacy is elusive. Work seems overwhelming. Creativity slows to a trickle. Physical exhaustion is common. Perfectionism is painful and debilitating—a no-win situation.

As parents, we influence our children’s emotional development. The bad news is, our own attitudes about love, acceptance, success, and failure can create an environment that promotes perfectionism.

The good news is, we can make positive changes that will enrich our children’s lives—and our own.

In this groundbreaking book, Tom Greenspon explains perfectionism, where it comes from (including influences outside the family), and what to do about it. He describes a healing process for transforming perfectionism into healthy living practices and self-acceptance.

If you think your child may be a perfectionist—if you’ve ever wondered if you’re a perfectionist—this book is for you.

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Aug 2023
This resource has religious influence.

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About Thomas S. Greenspon

Tom Greenspon is a Licensed Psychologist, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and author in private practice in Minneapolis. He earned a B.A. from Yale and a Ph.D. in psychology from the University of Illinois in 1968. After a postdoctoral fellowship at the University of Rochester, NY, he joined the faculty of the Medical Center at the University of Alabama in Birmingham, where he was involved in teaching, research, and counseling until moving to the Twin Cities in 1977. Tom lectures and writes on a variety of topics, including couples’ and family relationships, intimacy and sexuality, and the emotional needs of gifted children and adults. He is a member of several professional organizations, he has authored a monograph on adolescent-adult relationships for the Unitarian Universalist Association, entitled Human Connections, and a number of his articles have appeared in professional journals.

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